Grandma,
It's been a year and you've missed out on a lot! I finally moved into that house I was telling you about, I got ANOTHER job, I've made the Dean's List twice since you've been gone, and I successfully made it to Disney World once again (let's be honest - I'll be suckering mom and dad into family vacations until they don't vacation anymore). I've also found my home here at Southeast, even though I know how much you hated when I was gone for weeks at a time. You would be really proud of me. My 21st birthday was a little under a month ago, and all I could think about was your last Thanksgiving when all you wanted was a margarita. I get it, because same. Momma finally whipped grandpa into shape. Well.. Kinda. He still is the GROUCHIEST old man I think I've ever met, but he's gotten soft and I can see right through him. He loves it when I come home to visit him on my breaks from school, so I make sure I stop by when I can. Sorry I didn't come see you as often. Tyler finally got his license, so we (mom) don't have to drive him everywhere. Want to make bets on how long it takes him to wreck the truck?! He's already partially destroyed the boat and ruined one of those big wooden blocks that I used to balance on at the end of the driveway. What's next?? I've also grown a lot this past year. For a while, the rain scared me a little because it reminded me of the mud that my feet were covered in after the ambulance drove away, carrying you. Even the chills that I felt the first time I got REALLY sick in the winter gave me flashbacks to the phone call I had with my best friend just after I was able to process what was happening that night. I'm not saying this so you can feel sorry for me, I'm saying this so you won't do it to me again because that was just rude. You always did like to have dramatic exits. I loved going through mom's old bedroom with all of your stuff that you stockpiled for absolutely no reason. I found a couple of your Bibles from when you were little, some letters, birthday cards, and your high school diploma. I'll have a college diploma to sit right next to it here in the next 6 months. Don't miss graduation!! I hope your daddy welcomed you with open arms when you finally saw him again! I can't wait to meet him and tell you all of my stories. I love you, and I miss you more than I ever knew I could. Merry Christmas, Grandma. We'll all be okay here. xoxo, Michelle
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Do you ever find yourself stuck on a roller coaster where the bar holding you down just won't give way? I love my life, don't get me wrong, but it seems like those roller coaster days happen more often than not.
If you didn't already know, I will be graduating in just a few months (Six, to be exact) with my bachelors degree before I go onto graduate school. My favorite questions is what I'm going to do from here, or why I chose the program that I am pursuing. The most frustrating part about these questions is honestly the response that I get when I answer it. People tend to give you the "Oh, okay" look, where they hear your words but don't actually agree with your decision. They think that what you choose to do with your life is not actually where you should be, so you're not "good enough." Enough. I have learned to absolutely, positively, with every fiber of my being hate that word. How do we measure it? How do we know what it ACTUALLY is? Who decides it? We spend so much time, especially as Christians, telling ourselves and our kiddos not to judge others. Then we turn around and have the ability to decide what is or is not enough? You're not pretty enough. You're not smart enough. You're not outgoing enough. You're not busy enough. You don't make enough. You're not skinny enough. You're not ______ enough. These words begin to haunt us and tell us what we can or can not do, and it allows society to control our minds in a manipulative way. Christ has shown us time and again that we are more than enough. We are conquerors, winners, leaders, and so so loved in the eyes of the Lord. With that being said.. Why do we not see ourselves the way that Christ sees us as enough? Okay, so I know it has been a while since I’ve written. I missed it, actually. I love having the time to put all of my thoughts into one place, and for you nosey people out there, you might enjoy it too.
Some things that I have learned since the last semester ended: 1: Being an adult is really hard. 2: Being an adult with a degree sounds weird so I don’t want to do it. 3: But I guess if I have to do it I’ll move somewhere new {Hopefully to Florida, but we will see} 4: God has so many plans for me that are SO much better than what I could possibly imagine. The fourth one is honestly really hard to swallow. I am the oldest child, the type A personality (and for those of you that have met my other, you KNOW what I am talking about), and I like to know exactly what will be happening and when. It’s in my blood. I remember the first time my family took a trip to Disney by ourselves I was in high school, and of course I thought my way was the right way always. However, my mother disagreed and we both decided that we needed to make a vacay itinerary (I know, we’re crazy don’t judge), which just gave us more to argue about. To this day, we agree on mostly everything until it comes to planning. What I find really funny about that is that I find myself doing the exact same thing with God sometimes. Of course, in my mind, I know exactly where I want to go when I graduate, what I want my career to look like, and that I will be married eventually (HAHA WISH ME LUCK). I’ll spend my extra time in His word, but when it comes to my life, I plan things out according to ME and what I want. It’s really unfortunate sometimes, but that’s just not how things work. Giving up that reign that you have on your life (or think you have) is REALLY difficult. Exhibit A: Last summer I was taking summer classes to make up for my crappy semester GPA. I wanted SO badly to go to Camp Baldwin with the Liberty DuQuoin Youth group, but it just was not going to happen. I had an internship, a job, and the list goes on. However, this year was different. The way that I had gotten to attend was not really planned, and I really struggled at first with the idea. Of course I wanted to go back, but I knew it would be a different atmosphere than what I had experienced as a camper, and that scared me. I missed my friends, and I missed being a camper. I was scared of the group I was taking and how they would approach me, if they would even enjoy my company, and if I was even supposed to be there, all prior to us leaving. I remember texting all of my friends and just asking them to calm my nerves because I really didn’t know what to expect. I realized when we left that I was looking at it for all of the wrong reasons. This summer, I was taking classes again, working multiple jobs, and I lived in anther town when our little camp van pulled out of the parking lot.. But this summer was my season. My heart was ready, it was just my head that was thinking otherwise. I realized the week that I went with those kids, that in my submission to Christ and what he actually wants in my life (trust me, I prayed the ENTIRE drive down there) I can be so much more than what I would even see for myself. The potential for me when I am in my own head is great, but the potential that I have when I am living for Christ is so much greater. Then, of course, I ended up falling in love with those kids and with Camp Baldwin all over again. Moral of the story, know your own truth. Read the Bible for yourself, not just because people tell you that you should do it. Know what you believe and how it can change your life because when you KNOW it, you live it. xoxo, Michelle "All these people, people I'll never know. Some are poor, some are rich, some sleep in beds, some sleep on the floor.. But, at the end of the day.. Everyone sleeps. And I guess, if you think about it hard, that other stuff.. everyone's got too." - Daisha
If you live in America and have any form of social media, like any at all, I'm sure by now that you have heard of the show This is Us. I had absolutely no interest in it at first, and I thought it was going to be a complete waste of my time, (I know I'm a college kid, I probably waste more time . than the trashcan in my bedroom floor) but you catch my drift. Like every other TV series that I either loved or avoided as a child, I got it from my mother (there's your shoutout, Ma). Now, for this show in particular, I love that it shows so may viewpoints. It seems so raw and the writer seems so genuine, right? This past week (SPOILER ALERT) Daisha, a girl who has lived her life in and out of the foster system, came back to her safe place. She found a home with one of the Big Three of the show and tried her absolute best to avoid calling it HOME. When she finally sat down with him and realized that his home was her safe haven, she began to open up. She talks about how he sees them as similar, and how she did not agree at first, but then she understood. For those that are dedicated fans, you know what I am talking about when I say that it pulls at your heartstrings. You KNOW what it means when someone retweets a picture of a crockpot sitting on a kitchen counter and the emotional roller coaster that goes along with it. For me, though, this last week was different. Daisha and her life was like the roller coaster that I see people, including myself, have with Christ. It is the same type if heartstring-pulling, gut wrenching, tear-jerker that we feel when we get so engulfed with This is Us. Are you with me? Everyone has something. Everyone has their own struggles. Everyone sleeps. But, at the end of the day we know what we call home. It may be a necklace or a pendant, it may be a person, it may be a dog (I MISS KAISLEY), but as much as we would like to admit it, we all have something. Something. Daisha dealt with her situation differently than what you could call the extreme, but Christ welcomes us back to him the same way that Randall did with Daisha. He always has his phone on him when we need to call, and he is always concerned about how warm our home is. He wants to know our struggles and he wants to know our stories. We can run away as fast as we possibly can, but as soon as we tire out and need a place to rest, he is always there. Without someone like that in our lives, how will we deal with our version of something? ps - This is not a critique of the show This is Us but it is a recommendation for Jesus Christ. “Let me experience your faithful love in the morning, for I trust in you. Reveal to me the way I should go because I appeal to you. Rescue me from my enemies, Lord; I come to you for protection. Teach me to do your will, for you are my God. May your gracious Spirit lead me on level ground."
Psalm 143:8-10 It has been a LONG week. I think the weeks start to feel much longer when I forget how important it is to put a book as a priority in my life. I’m not just talking about any book. No textbooks for my classes, no devotionals (although they make a WORLD of difference), and no dictionaries to really try and understand what the world around me is doing {because that is nearly impossible}. I am talking about THE book. The Bible. The one that can encourage me, show me what love should be like, and that guides me into tomorrow. It is my link to Him. Since I left Passion in January, I have been trying to implement these new to-do lists in my life that glorify Him. Staying true to my devotional, listening to more music that builds me up, and recently, I have been starting my day off with a statement of truth over my life. This week hit me. HARD. Passion really emphasized how you should not do or say what you know in your heart to not be true. Because of my experience leading worship and finding a passion in that, it really meant something special to me. It reminds you that even if you don’t feel it in the moment, you do it because HE deserves it. Listen to these words. Don’t just hear them or read them, but LISTEN. For I trust in you. Reveal to me the way I should go. Teach me to do your will. Lead me on level ground. Shall I say them again? I have been praying this every morning for almost a week and it took four days for me to REALLY understand it. I have to put my trust in Him, because who else can I REALLY trust? HE is the one that guides where I should go, HE will make the way for me, and HE will be my peace when I feel like the world is spinning in circles. Here's the jist of it all. Sometimes you will have bad weeks. Sometimes you will have those days where you want to crawl into bed and never get back out of it. THATS OKAY. Be content with the fact that Christ is there for you, in the good and bad, and the comfort you may feel wrapped in a blanket is the same comfort that he can provide for you as well. Food for thought. Happy Tuesday. xoxo, Michelle They were everywhere. All over the gym floor, up and down the stands, and plastered on every single one of them was this looked that was a little bit of curiosity mixed with a smile. The announcer had just called those that were different to the floor. They each removed their shoes and sat, crisscross applesauce, while they were waiting for more instructions. They sat in groups. Some groups matched with missing left hands, some missing their right leg, and others, having no arms at all. Am I freaking you out yet? Do you know what it feels like to be different? I mean, to REALLY be different. To be different in the sense that when you walk into a room, people look at you like you have seven eyes (not that I have ever seen someone that has seven eyes) but you get the drill. No? Me either. Few people genuinely understand, actually. For most people, what they are dealing with in life is on the inside. It could be relational problems, financial issues, wondering what they want for dinner, thinking about their dogs at home (not that I do this often), or just dreaming about where they could go in life. It is not always negative, but it brings out the differences in humanity. It really defines the idea of “You never know what people are dealing with, so be nice,” doesn’t it? Honestly, I had no idea. I knew what it felt like to be kind to others and to respect differences, but I did not truly understand. I had no idea what a glance, or the frequency of them, could do to someone. I tried not to stare. I tried not to question everything that was happening in front of me for the next three days that were to come, but how could I be anything less than shocked? I had never seen anything like this before, but I was fighting back tears as I watched it all. They started. Some were done in seconds and some took a few minutes longer. Some had never done it before, and some had no idea how. They were tying their shoes. Now, I learned when I was around 5 years old. I remember sitting on my parents’ bed when I had my dad’s massive tennis shoes in my lap and they showed me how to do it. One bunny ear, two bunny ears, and loop. Easy, right? Try it with one hand. Right now. Sit there, with your tennis shoes in your lap, and try it. No luck? It takes time. It takes practice. But eventually, there’s perfection. They were of all ages. Some were just littles that entered kindergarten, some were college athletes, and some already had their own kiddos, but they all had a common denominator. They were all limb-different of some sort, and they were ALL smiling. What did I learn that day? Well, first off, I learned to double check myself before glancing at someone too often or too long, because in reality, I’m the one that looks out of place. I learned that I should not take what Susie said to me three days ago as a true insult because I could ALWAYS have it worse. And, last but certainly not least, I learned to be persistent. This place, these people, and these circumstances were so not my comfort zone. When you are walking around, surrounded with hundreds of people that look the same, and you are not like them, you look different. This can be in so many different ways, but this organization, this NubAbility that everyone is talking about, it’s changing lives. I remember sitting in the pool with two girls my very first year that I was a part of the organization. It was the first time that swimming was even an option, and we had more people than we had expected. I was in the shallow end of the water with the littles that had never learned to swim before (yeah, I had kiddos in the water that were missing limbs by myself, but hey we survived). By the end of the session with them, some were floating on a kickboard, some were kicking on the side of the wall, and some were swimming around me in circles. But these two girls would not leave my side. One was African-American and the other was from Asia. I remember one of them asking me why we look different, and why my face is lighter than theirs. Then the other lifted her hand to my face so her palm was easily compared to the color of my cheek. I told the girls to look at their hands. They noticed that their pals were all pale, like mine, and we decided right then and there that we were sisters. I fell in love that day. I fell in love with an organization that takes these differences that people, especially kids, are facing, and it turns them into champions. It takes that shame and fear they have when they walk into a building, the building I went to high school, and transforms it into pride and the love for themselves that they never knew was there. It allows people like me to recognize that the differences can be good. It reminds you that things in life, even the small ones like fastening laces on a shoe, can be big challenges to others. It reminds you to be kind, to love others, and to open your eyes. From an outsider's perspective, this organization is changing lives. It is shining light on a community that most people forget exists. It is developing friendships, it is recognizing accomplishments, and it is making a difference for those who are different. It is reminding kids that they really do have the power to accomplish what they are set out to do, even if it may take some extra practice. Last but not least, it is showing the world that we really are made perfect in the eyes of Jesus. xoxo, Michelle So, here we are. Presents have been opened and the house is covered in gifts. The warmest (and fuzziest) blankets that we own are all over the couch. Christmas movies have been playing all day. And, of course, the lights on the tree have been glowing since Santa came at midnight.
I saw it coming. We knew it could be soon, but nobody had expected it to be before Christmas. The idea of fulfilling "Grandma's lasts" started about a month ago, and she knew it too. When we asked what she wanted for Christmas, she said she didn't need anything because she wouldn't be here long enough to use it. I always did hate it when she was right. Fortunately, it is all in God's timing. I have been praying for her, for this to come gently. It came in a time where we had the chance to cherish days with her, but not untimely. I was home for Christmas. We were in the same town when we got the call, and that could not have been more perfect. It came when we had just spent precious time with dear family and two little faces that can light up a room just by walking in. It came when she knew she was loved, and she felt that, but the cancer took her anyway. After they declared her, I left. I went back to the house that my grandma raised a family in and taught me how to choose ripe tomatoes from spoiled ones. It was that same house that I learned to love dogs, because she did too, and where my sass was encouraged by the woman who ran it. In that house is nothing but memories. All the sewing, hide-n-seek games, family Christmas dinners, sleepovers, late-night-breakfasts, and afternoons by the creek that I will not be able to get out of my mind. It was also a house that felt peaceful. There was no more pain, only the thought of the love that she had to share. As I corralled her pup, I turned her oxygen tank off for the last time and folded her new blanket. It was purple and fuzzy, the one I picked out for her just two weeks before. I moved into the kitchen to feed the little monster and I started throwing away the mess that was left on the kitchen table from my mom and I sifting through papers to look for a medication sheet. I knocked off her cup, a purple knock-off Yeti, and I laughed at myself because I used to hate the color purple. It was the color of my bedroom when I was little, and I couldn't stand it for years. Today it brings me a different story, from many different events. I shut the front door to the house and wondered what would happen next. Of course, I will never know the answer to that question, but it was nice to imagine the possibilities. When I think about it, I feel as if I somehow knew. The timing was not the best, but it WAS God's. I was at peace with it. She was no longer unhappy and uncomfortable, but she was probably dancing with her father and mocking me for something ignorant I had done that day. As I had packed my bags to come home just the day before, I remember setting out two dresses across my bed. One was planned to be worn the day of Christmas Eve to a church service, and the other dress was packed just because. I don't know why I packed it, to be honest, but I'm glad I did. So, tomorrow morning as we say our final goodbyes to the overly-sassy, ever-loving grandmother that helped shape me into the person I am today, I will be wearing that dress that I packed. The purple, never worn dress, because she would love it. I will sing one last song for her, because she taught my mother to sing, and that gift has been passed on to me. And after, we will cherish the time we have together because it is ALL God's timing, and NOT ours. Merry Christmas, y'all. xoxo, Michelle Romona Caraker, 12.22.2017. "Snow is falling Christmas Eve Lights are coming on up and down the street The sound of carols fills the air And people rushing home, families everywhere Putting candles in the windows Lights upon the tree But there's no laughter in this house Not like there used to be There's just a million little memories That remind me you're not here It's just a different kind of Christmas this year In the evening fires glow Dancing underneath the mistletoe A letter left from Santa Clause Won't be the same this year in this house because There's one less place set at the table One less gift under the tree And a brand new way to take their place inside of me I'm unwrapping all these memories Fighting back the tears It's just a different kind of Christmas this year There's voices in the driveway Families right outside the door And we'll try to make this Christmas like the ones we've had before As we gather round the table, I see joy on every face And I realize what's still alive is the legacy you made It's time to put the candles in the windows, the lights upon the tree It's time to fill this house with laughter like it used to be Just because you're up in heaven, doesn't mean you're not near It's just a different kind of Christmas It's just a different kind of Christmas this year" Being comfortable is something that people aim for. However, this picture brings nothing but uncomfortable memories for me. I love theatre with my whole heart, don't get me wrong. But this picture reminds me of high school, and who WANTS to think about that again? It reminds me of the thoughts that ran through my mind when the script for James and the Giant Peach was handed to me and I was told I was going to be a ladybug. It reminds me of sitting on top of that peach while stage hands moved it in circles, and I was being held up by a piece of wood WITH my best friend, and our heads were right next to the stage lights. It was hot, it was awkward, and I felt like I should have been performing for a class of third grade kids. At the same time, I loved it. I love being on stage, hair and makeup ready, and putting that little mic on my face with medical tape (even though I absolutely HATE medical tape). I loved my director and everyone that worked alongside her to make things happen. I love performing. But..it made me uncomfortable. So.. I Googled it. I looked up the definition of comfortable, and it was actually really interesting. It is the idea of having physical or mental comfort, or ease. It is also defined as feeling ease to accommodate oneself. That last part hit me. Accommodating yourself seems selfish, right? Focusing on what YOU want instead of what you really should be doing? And this goes back to.. what? Temptations? Peer pressure? Uncertainty? Doubt? I think we are too focused on being comfortable because it allows us to be silent. We do not have to step out of our comfort zone, we do not have to try new things, we do not have to be around people we do not know.. It's just comfortable. But at the same time, I think comfort is dangerous. It aids you in ignoring parts of your life that you NEED to be challenged in, like faith. It allows you to stay to yourself more than necessary, leaving relationships astray. So if you think about it, why do we try so hard to stay comfortable in every aspect of our lives? Now, don't get me wrong. I am a fan of sweatpants and baggy tshirts, and anyone who knows me understands my love for napping. That is not what I am talking about. I'm really digging into the idea that many of us, including myself, get so wrapped up in the life that we live in and the motions that we are used to that we leave our faith where it is. We stop digging when we feel that we are in a good place, and we become satisfied. We think, "Well, I go to church every week, I listen to Christian music, and I am a good person, so I shouldn't be worried." RIGHT?? I see this all the time, and I have been there myself. It's scary. I don't have a cure-all for this, it's just been on my mind. A few weeks back, I heard someone say, "You produce more fruit when you're in the valley rather than the mountaintop," and I have never heard something more accurate. When you start doubting, leaning on things of this world, and become distracted, it allows for us to fill that hunger for the Word with people or things, and that is the last thing we need to be doing. It tempts us to believe that if we do not FEEL the presence of God, that he is not even there, and that is furthest from the truth. Perseverance is key, and having the ability to hand over your worries to Him is necessary to keep growing. God is with you. Jesus loves you. Life is hard, but we are all in this together. {High School Musical pun intended} xoxo, Michelle School is hard. I'm not just talking about the classes and making yourself get out of bed in the morning, but the whole idea of college and everything that comes with it. I am not far from home, but I am far enough that everyday activities and the stress that my family is under does not really affect me. That is crazy to me. I am learning how to be my own person, to make the right choices, and to "adult." Unfortunately, I must be reminded time and again that I cannot do it on my own. I can't control other people, I can't live my life saying what-if, and I can't stress about the unknowns just because I am a control freak. That is really hard to wrap my mind around.
Here are five ways that I have found to grow in my faith, remain strong when I want to crawl in bed and cry, and to live a happier life: 1) Find your song: Anytime I find myself in a situation where I am frustrated, angry, sad, stressed, or I don't know where to turn, music has always been my go-to. Throughout high school, I remember turning on "With Everything" and I would play it on repeat until I fell asleep, or I would play it every morning before school. The lyrics that really hit me said, "Let hope rise and darkness tremble in your holy light; that every eye will see Jesus our God, great and mighty to be praised." Then, at the end, they repeat the words "with everything" so many times that it begins to resonate with you. It is so, so powerful. When you do this with songs more and more, the passages in the scripture that relate to the verses in the songs allow things to be so much more clear than before. 2) Relate it to scripture and stand firm in that: Lately, my song has changed. Not in a bad way, but in a seasonal type of way. As I have grown this year, I found myself time and time again relying on myself, and not who I should be focusing on. It lead me to the point that I thought nothing was going the right way, and doubt started to take over. Then, I heard the song Psalm 46. I don't know why the song made such a difference in my life, but when I heard those words and went to look up the scripture, the words jumped out of the page at me. They told me that everything really would be okay. 3) Find a church and stick with it: I know that going to a church is really awkward for the first visit. Trust me, I know, I have been there. I can't decide if the worst part is deciding where to sit in fear that you will take someone's "unassigned assigned seat," or the unwanted time in the service when the pastor tells you to greet people, and you are sitting there.. alone. Luckily for me, after the first awkward service, I found a love for my new church. The people are kind, the worship is intense, the pastors are genuine, and the Spirit is present. 4) Find a group of people that keep you in line: I have such a heart for people. I may not always like people, but helping them, serving them, and ministering with them is my favorite thing to do. Having the opportunity to do this has been such a blessing over the years, whether that be through a children's program or through my Remix group. But HOLY MOLY let me tell you about my girls. At Remix, we have started a small girls group where we encourage each other, love on each other, and have something exciting to look forward to when we meet every week. They make my heart swell when I get to see them, and knowing that we are all Christ-like ladies running after the same Creator is something so special. 5) READ: I hate reading. I do not like books, I do not like textbooks, and the thought of reading for fun is disgusting to me. Unfortunately, I let this get the best of me, especially when I was in high school, and I saw the Bible as just another book. Boy, was I wrong. I started digging and looking for what it really is that I believe to be true. Yes, I could recite to you the fruits of the spirit and the armour of God that was drilled into my head since I was little, but actually having scriptural evidence behind what I was saying was important to me. So, I bought some really cute, in-depth devotionals, a new Bible with room to journal on the sides, and I fell in love. It is so much easier when you are excited about it, even if it is about "the Instagram" at first. Hi. Hello. Nice to meet you. So, no, I did not wake up one morning and suddenly think "I HAVE TO START A BLOG RIGHT NOW." In fact, I never actually saw myself successfully doing this. However, my professor keeps talking about networking and blah, blah, blah.. So I decided to make this. During her lecture. (Shhh, it's okay) The idea is to share my stories and experiences, and hopefully how Jesus has worked through them all. So here we go. I am 19 years old and I was told 9 months ago that I had a stroke. WHAT? Yeah, I know. That's the same reaction I get from everyone. But, it happened. I have had chronic migraine since I started high school, and of course they sucked, but it was never really thought of as a concern. This past year, my first year at SEMO, I got really sick. My migraines and their symptoms began to take over my life, so I was sent to a neurologist and they told me the news. For most people, this would be damaging. Don't get me wrong, it was. I remember how paralyzed I felt when I hung up the phone with my doctor, and how distant I felt when my best friend in the entire world held me while I was sobbing. I remember sitting in the floor of my room in pure terror when I had to call my parents and tell them what a stranger had just told me. And we can't forget the days I spent after, crying in the shower. However, I had a peace about it. My life has jumped from one doctor to another since January. I have been to four cities, two states, and had way too many tests done for me to count. But I absolutely love it. I'm not trying to sound like a nut (even though I totally am), but it has given me a new outlook on the way that I handle things in my own life. Think about this with me.. I was told at 19 that I had a stroke. Not just a baby stroke, or a TIA, but a significant event in my life that should have caused problems. You know why it didn't? JESUS. I look at life from a fresh perspective and it is the best thing that could have ever happened to me. I'm sure we have all heard the "life life like you're dying" or "live like tomorrow will never come." Honestly, this is the best way to live. When doubt starts to creep into my life, I turn it around. When I get flustered and start to forget something, or even have trouble remembering, I think back to "you are here for a purpose." It also has brought a testimony to my life that I would have never expected. It allows you to be open, because why would you want to spend your life being an unopened present? It allows you to accept others, to smile daily, and to meet new people often. It has allowed me to jump out of my comfort zone and connect with people on a deeper level. It has allowed my life as a Christian to be flipped upside down, shaken, and blossom into something beautiful. THIS is why I started my blog. I have learned countless lessons, and I still learn those lessons daily. But these lessons also come with challenges, and heartache, and loss of friendships. They come with scripture and song lyrics, and the wonderful church families that I get to be a part of. It's a beautiful disaster, and it's perfectly imperfect. But, hey, we're in this thing called life together, right? xoxo, Michelle |